Raising Self-Motivated Kids Through Emotional Intelligence: Candy Chan’s Journey with Hoppity Learning
Written by Heather Anderson
Candy Chan's journey from a research engineer to founder of Hoppity Learning wasn’t a traditional career shift—it was a heartfelt mission inspired by a personal story. Driven by a desire to equip children and parents with the tools to build strong connections and emotional intelligence, Candy created Hoppity Learning to bridge the gap between home and school. She brings a refreshing blend of professional insight, personal experience, and deep empathy into her work, offering parents the skills to nurture their children's growth in ways that resonate and last.
You’ve had such an interesting journey, from ranking 26th out of 30 students in your 5th-grade class to attending Stanford and becoming a research engineer. What inspired you to shift gears and create Hoppity Learning for families?
My life purpose became clear to me over time: to empower children and parents. Being a research engineer gave me the skills to dig deep into problems and explore generational challenges in parenting. One pivotal moment was when a four-year-old I taught in church later attempted suicide as a teenager. It broke my heart, and I knew that despite her coming from a loving family, something had been missing to help her navigate those difficult years between ages 4 and 16 (Pre-K to high school). This experience pushed me to transition from a high-paying, comfortable career in engineering to early childhood education. I first became a preschool teacher, and then during the pandemic, I launched Hoppity Learning to help families develop emotional intelligence skills. I then saw that even older children needed these tools, which planted the seeds for creating a more comprehensive program.
You’ve assembled an incredible advisory team for Hoppity Learning. How did you go about building such a comprehensive and diverse group of experts?
When I started Hoppity Learning, I knew I needed help from people with deep expertise and a shared passion for supporting children and families. I reached out to advisors like Dr. Anabel Jensen, a pioneer in emotional intelligence and gifted children education. I also connected with Rossana Lin, a top parenting expert in China, and David Lin, who founded Microsoft Accelerator in China. Later, I brought on Paulina Olsson, who had a background in emotional intelligence and ran a software company in Sweden backed by LEGO Ventures. Each advisor contributes unique insights and shares the same heart for helping children and parents thrive emotionally and socially.
“In moments of frustration or stress, take a deep breath and acknowledge your own feelings first. Then, try to understand why your child might be feeling a certain way. This moment of self-reflection and empathy can make all the difference.”
Your story about your dad’s response to your challenges as a child is so powerful. How does that influence the way you approach parent-child coaching today?
My dad was my biggest inspiration. Despite being an orphan, he always nurtured and encouraged me. When I was ranked 26th out of 30 in class, instead of scolding me, he acknowledged my hardworking nature and kept encouraging me to focus and improve. His patience and emotional intelligence were pivotal in driving me to excel, and within a few months, I went from 26th to No. 1 in my class. That experience showed me the power of encouragement and acknowledgment in a child’s development. It’s why I emphasize the same principles in my coaching—acknowledging children’s efforts and validating their feelings before setting boundaries or guiding them toward improvement.
Hoppity Learning focuses on teaching parents an EQ language that resonates with their children. Can you explain what this “EQ language” looks like and why it’s so effective in building strong connections?
EQ language is about acknowledging a child’s feelings first before setting boundaries or offering guidance. For example, if a child is having too much screen time, instead of jumping directly to “Stop playing,” we teach parents to start by acknowledging the child’s experience: “Wow, you must be really enjoying this game and gaining new skills.” This approach calms the child’s brain, making them more receptive to communication. It’s about shifting from an adversarial stance to a supportive role. By acknowledging what the child enjoys or feels, parents help them stay open to further guidance. Then, we move to communicate the limit: “We agreed on an hour, and it’s time for a break.” And finally, we target alternatives, giving the child choices within those limits, like ‘Want to go for a quick walk?’ or ‘Should we plan something fun for the weekend?’This way, the child feels understood, respected, and empowered to make decisions within safe boundaries.
In your experience, what are some of the biggest challenges parents face today when it comes to helping their children build social skills and manage emotions? How does your program address these issues?
The biggest challenges I see are tantrums, screen time issues, confidence struggles, bullying, and sibling rivalries . Many children struggle to recognize and express their feelings, and they often don't understand why their parents are worried or setting boundaries. In our program, we begin by helping children develop self-awareness, so they can identify their emotions and accept them as normal. We also work on building empathy, teaching children to see things from others’ perspectives—whether it’s understanding why their parents are worried about too much screen time or acknowledging their friends’ feelings. For parents, we focus on helping them communicate in a supportive way that opens up dialogue instead of triggering defensiveness.
You mentioned that Hoppity Learning’s tools help children become self-motivated. What’s one practical strategy or tool you love to share with parents to help them foster this motivation at home?
One strategy we use is rooted in the self-determination theory by Dr. Richard Ryan, which focuses on fostering autonomy, competence, and relatedness. The key is to give children a say in their tasks. For instance, if they’re practicing piano, let them decide the time and duration. Once children feel ownership over their choices, they are more motivated to follow through. At the same time, parents should remain supportive, offering guidance or flexibility when needed. This balance of autonomy and support builds intrinsic motivation in children, helping them feel responsible for their own actions and outcomes.
For parents who are connected to their children’s schools or PTAs, how can they bring Hoppity Learning’s workshops to their communities, and why are these partnerships so important to you?
Parents who are involved in their children’s schools or PTAs can connect us with their school’s PTA president or principal to arrange a Hoppity Learning workshop. We offer a discounted rate for schools, and each workshop is designed to equip parents with practical skills they can use right away to support their children’s emotional growth. Additionally, for every parent who enrolls in our coaching program, we donate $25 to $40 back to the PTA to support their initiatives. These partnerships are essential because when schools and parents work together, it creates a holistic approach that strengthens social-emotional learning both in the classroom and at home. This connection ensures that children receive consistent support, helping them build the EQ skills they need to succeed.
Parenting can be overwhelming, especially when it comes to supporting emotional development. What’s one piece of advice you’d give to parents who feel unsure about where to start in building their child’s EQ skills?
One fundamental skill I always recommend is to stay calm and pause before reacting. In moments of frustration or stress, take a deep breath and acknowledge your own feelings first. Then, try to understand why your child might be feeling a certain way. This moment of self-reflection and empathy can make all the difference. It's not about being perfect—parenting is full of ups and downs—but practicing this pause helps create a more understanding and supportive environment. Also, it’s important to remember that all feelings are okay, but how we express them matters. So, starting with empathy and self-care is key.
As a mom and teacher, you’ve seen firsthand how crucial emotional intelligence is for children’s success. How has your experience as a parent shaped the programs you’ve created for Hoppity Learning?
Being a mom has made me the first beneficiary of everything I teach. I used to have a very fixed mindset about what was “right” for my daughter, like insisting she eat certain foods or wear a jacket in cold weather. But through developing Hoppity Learning, I realized that I needed to let her have more autonomy and make her own choices—even if it meant letting her fail and learning from mistakes sometimes. This experience shaped my emphasis on empathy and autonomy in our programs. I’ve also learned to repair my relationship with my own mom, applying the same empathy and understanding to bridge the gaps that had built up over the years. It’s been healing for both of us.
Your husband’s background in technology and your combined passion for education make for a unique partnership. How do you both bring your skills together to create innovative learning experiences for families?
My husband played a key role in developing the first Nintendo Wii, so he brings a deep understanding of technology and interactive learning. We’re now working together to create an AI-based app that functions as a virtual coach, offering bite-sized EQ exercises that children can do in just a few minutes each day. We’ve already tested this approach with 31 children:24 of them hit 100% of their goals and the rest achieved 30% to 90%, which was a big surprise to their parents. The app will help us scale our efforts and make EQ coaching more accessible to families everywhere. It’s a perfect blend of his tech expertise and my passion for child development.
You emphasize showing love in ways children truly understand. Can you share a favorite story or example of how this has transformed a parent-child relationship through your coaching?
One of the most memorable transformations happened with a high-profile CEO and his child. They were traveling for a competition and arrived at their hotel late at night after getting lost. Both were tired and frustrated, and tensions were high. During our session, we worked on expressing feelings and listening to each other. By the end, the child thanked the dad for always attending their games, despite his busy schedule, and the dad apologized for raising his voice in frustration. They hugged, resolved their conflict, and the child went on to win the competition the next day. Moments like these show how powerful it can be to connect through understanding and appreciation.
What’s the most common misconception parents have about emotional intelligence, and how do you help them see its importance beyond just managing emotions?
The most common misconception is thinking that emotional intelligence is only about managing emotions. It’s much more than that—it’s about self-awareness, self-management, social skills, empathy, and making responsible decisions. For example, understanding emotions is just one piece. Emotional intelligence also involves planning, managing time, resolving conflicts, and making wise choices. By broadening the understanding of EQ beyond just emotions, we help parents see how these skills can positively impact all aspects of a child’s life, from academics to friendships to long-term decision-making.
Looking back on your own educational journey, what do you hope Hoppity Learning provides for children that maybe you wish you’d had when you were growing up?
I hope Hoppity Learning provides the kind of emotional support that I didn’t always have growing up. I kept a lot of my feelings to myself, never sharing them with my parents. There were times when I felt isolated, misunderstood, or hurt by other kids’ words, and I just internalized it. While my dad was my hero and supported me, there were still things I didn’t know how to communicate. I want children to have the tools to openly share with their parents and feel confident. It’s about creating a safe space where they can express themselves,receive the support they need, and acquire EQ skills for lifelong success.
If you could leave parents with one simple, everyday practice that makes a big difference in building emotional intelligence in their children, what would it be?
Acknowledging your child’s strengths every single day. Many children have low self-esteem because they hear so much about what they can do better or what needs improvement. I encourage parents to talk about their children’s strengths daily—what they did well, how they played nicely, or how they showed kindness. At home, my family and I come together every night to acknowledge each other’s strengths and express our appreciation. We do the same thing in our preschool, where children affirm each other’s strengths. It’s a powerful way to build confidence and reinforce positive behavior in a genuine, meaningful way.
Ready to Bring More Peace and Connection to Your Family? Here’s How to Get Started with Hoppity Learning!
Book a Free Mini Coaching Call: If you’d like personalized support, you can book a free mini coaching call with Candy Chan. This call is an opportunity to share your top parenting challenge and get expert advice tailored to your family’s needs. Book your free session here.
Explore Hoppity Learning’s Coaching Programs: Whether you prefer private coaching or want to join a small group session with friends, Hoppity Learning offers flexible coaching options to help parents navigate challenges with confidence and create peaceful, connected families.
Partner with Hoppity Learning at Your School: If you’re involved with your school’s PTA or community organization, you can bring Hoppity Learning’s impactful workshops to your community. Our school partnerships empower parents and teachers with practical skills, and each workshop includes a donation back to the PTA for every enrolled family. Learn more about partnership opportunities.
Follow Hoppity Learning on Social Media: Stay updated on parenting tips, EQ strategies, and more by following Hoppity Learning on Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, and YouTube.
You can also find Candy Chan on The M List, The Mamahood’s searchable database of mom-recommended resources, or connect and collaborate with Candy inside The Club membership for women Founders.