Creating Balanced Partnerships: Felicia Kashevaroff’s Mission to Revolutionize Relationship Equity
Written by Heather Anderson
Felicia Kashevaroff, founder of Tend Task and an expert in relationship equity coaching, is on a mission to reshape modern partnerships. After navigating the complex dynamics of marriage, motherhood, and divorce, Felicia developed a deep passion for helping couples build equal, balanced relationships. In this interview, Felicia shares her personal journey, the tools and methodologies she uses to support couples, and her vision for a subtle revolution in how partnerships function in today’s world.
Can you share the personal journey that led you to found Tend Task and focus on relationship equity coaching?
I studied sociology at UCSB, where I became fascinated by how social systems influence our personal lives—particularly the way gender dynamics shape relationships. After graduation, I took a job to save up for grad school, which is where I met my ex-husband. Our early days were exciting, filled with travel, new experiences, and romance. But once we had children, the balance shifted dramatically—I found myself supporting his entrepreneurial dreams and taking on most of the household responsibilities. While there’s nothing inherently wrong with this setup, it wasn’t intentional, and over time, it became clear that my own aspirations had been sidelined. This imbalance created tension, and ultimately, our relationship ended in divorce.
After that, I tapped back into my social science background and dove into research, reading feminist authors and exploring how an unequal division of labor impacts relationships. That’s when I created Tend Task, starting with a mobile app that helped women track their invisible labor. Women responded well to the app, but it was clear tracking alone wasn’t enough—we needed solutions for how to improve relationships. That’s what inspired me to pursue relationship equity coaching, helping couples build truly balanced partnerships.
With the striking statistic that only 33% of marriages are happy, how does Tend Task aim to change this narrative for couples?
It’s shocking to realize how many people are in unhappy relationships. At Tend Task, we help couples establish foundational skills to build balanced, equitable partnerships. We create a space where couples can get clear on their shared vision for the future, deconstruct unconscious gender biases, and learn evidence-based communication strategies. It’s about ensuring both partners are equally involved—not just in household tasks, but in creating a joyful and connected relationship. We provide tools to foster balance in all aspects of life, not just the physical work at home.
“Gender roles are deeply ingrained and can be difficult to break free from, even for people who consider themselves progressive.”
You've undergone extensive training in coaching methodologies, including the Gottman method and ORSC. How do these methodologies influence your approach with clients?
I believe it's important for coaches to continuously learn, so I use a variety of methodologies depending on the couple’s unique situation. The Gottman method is the gold standard for understanding relationship health, based on years of research by John and Julie Gottman. Their work highlights what makes couples successful and what drives them apart. While their approach is more therapeutic, the core principles apply to relationship coaching.
ORSC, on the other hand, applies team coaching best practices to relationship coaching. One of the most impactful elements of this is the focus on the relationship itself as the client, not the individuals in it. When coaching a couple, the relationship becomes the third entity we’re working on together. This method allows us to view the relationship holistically, helping couples navigate challenges from a shared perspective.
The concept of "tending" to relationships rather than just focusing on tasks is powerful. How does this philosophy shape your coaching sessions?
Modern life can be overwhelming, with so many tasks pulling us in different directions. In our sessions, I help couples focus on what’s truly important—tending to their relationship, their children, and their shared future, rather than just reacting to life’s demands. It’s about creating intentionality in how you move through your day-to-day, rather than letting the loudest task dictate your attention.
After 20 years of marriage and your personal journey through divorce, what was the pivotal moment that turned your experience into a mission to help others?
During my divorce, I leaned on my friends and community for support. Through these conversations, I realized my experience wasn’t unique—so many women were struggling with an unequal division of labor in their relationships. It struck me that this was a systemic issue that too many people felt they had to face alone. I wanted to help couples find a better way to address these challenges and avoid the heartache I had experienced.
You’ve mentioned a “subtle revolution” in partnerships through your work. What does this revolution look like in practice, and how can couples start it in their own relationships?
We live in a patriarchal society, and shifting gender dynamics within a home is a revolutionary act. When couples create balanced, mutually beneficial partnerships, they set an example for friends, family, and—most importantly—their children. This ripple effect creates cultural change, where gendered expectations no longer define how we share the mental load or care for our families. The revolution starts with couples intentionally deconstructing these roles, setting shared goals, and modeling equality for future generations.
Many couples struggle with traditional gender roles. How does Tend Task help them navigate and overcome these challenges?
Gender roles are deeply ingrained and can be difficult to break free from, even for people who consider themselves progressive. My ex-husband and I both identified as feminists, but when we became parents, we unintentionally slipped into traditional roles—I stayed home while he focused on his career. Without intentional discussions around how we wanted our partnership to look, we defaulted to what society expected. Through coaching, I help couples deconstruct these unconscious biases and replace them with behaviors that align with their actual values and goals.
How do you address different standards between partners when it comes to household tasks?
This is a common issue in relationships. Often, one partner holds higher standards, but those standards aren’t necessarily “right.” Couples need to negotiate their shared standards together. If one partner prefers to go above and beyond, that’s their choice, but they shouldn’t expect their partner to match those standards—or resent them for not doing so. It’s important to define what "good enough" looks like for both partners.
Can you share a success story of a couple you’ve helped transform their relationship?
I worked with a couple struggling with how to give and receive feedback, especially around parenting. The wife would often correct the husband in real-time while he was interacting with the kids, which led him to shut down and disengage. We developed a system where they created shared notes on their phones—one for feedback and one for praise. They could then reflect and communicate outside of the moment, leading to more productive conversations and a healthier dynamic. It’s a strategy I now recommend to many clients.
For someone interested in beginning their journey with Tend Task, what can they expect from their initial coaching session?
It depends on how they want to work with me. If they opt for one-on-one coaching, we start with an intake session where we explore their relationship history, family dynamics, and the goals they want to achieve. From there, we create a customized plan. For those who choose the course, it’s more structured, with four specific modules guiding couples through the process of building a balanced partnership. Coaching sessions can be done privately or in small group cohorts, depending on their preference.
Looking toward the future, what are your aspirations for Tend Task, and how do you envision its impact on the landscape of relationship coaching?
My vision is for Tend Task to become synonymous with joyful, balanced relationships. I want it to be the go-to resource for couples seeking equality in their partnerships. While we currently offer coaching and courses, I’d love to scale these resources into our mobile app, making it a one-stop shop for couples to access tools on demand. Coaching will always be available for those needing extra support, but the app will allow for more self-guided solutions.
What are your thoughts on the Fair Play method when it comes to balancing the division of labor?
Fair Play is a great tool that’s opened up important conversations about division of labor, and I applaud Eve Rodsky for her work. However, it doesn’t work for everyone. Many of my clients come to me after trying Fair Play, feeling defeated after finding that implementing it was more difficult than expected. Fair Play requires a strong foundation in communication and equality that many couples haven’t yet built. I view it as an advanced tool—helpful for those who have already done the work of deconstructing gender roles and establishing a shared vision for their relationship.
If you’re ready to create a more balanced, equitable, and joyful partnership, Tend Task offers several resources to help you get started:
Download Felicia’s free ebook
Access the Tend Task app for support in managing your household
Sign up for a free 30-minute coaching consultation to explore how Felicia can help you and your partner build the relationship you’ve always wanted.
Use the code MAMAHOOD25 for a 25% discount on the signature 12-week course, The TEND Technique.
Connect with Felicia Kashevaroff on Instagram, Facebook or LinkedIn.
You can also find Felicia Kashevaroff on The M List, The Mamahood’s searchable database of mom-recommended resources, or connect and collaborate with her inside The Club membership for women founders.